Friday, April 10, 2015

Imbalanced sea metaphors

"Every day I discover more and more beautiful things. It’s enough to drive one mad. I have such a desire to do everything, my head is bursting with it."
- Claude Monet  

I was once told by the internet that adults make a lot of lists and oh my god, is that true. I make hella lists. All I do is make lists. I feel like I have more pads of post-its than I do places to actually put those post-its. I write everything down; It's not even a matter of being organized, but rather I forget everything I don't write down. So, I write it all down, basically in as many places as I can. Listing and planning is an important part of the process of Getting Shit Done, as long as it doesn't take up all the time that could/should be spent on the actually doing of the shit that needs to be done. It's a hard balance to distinguish for me, because the planning process is the easiest and most cathartic part -- I'm not being judged or graded on my notes, so I don't feel outside pressure hindering my ability to think freely. However, it's also an activity I normally feel I can do while multitasking (there aren't many activities I feel I can't do while multitasking, whether that's accurate or not) which means I'm not really devoting my time to getting anything finitely done. If I'm not actually finishing anything, what am I accomplishing? I'm basically just wasting time, labeling my procrastination as "organizing my thoughts" or "creating a game plan." All good strategies to tackle projects, but not in the precious, dwindling time before it's due. Then all that's just nonsense and it's time to sit down and actually put some hard work into it.
Imbalanced: the life of a terrible Libra
I've always struggled with the balancing act of life. I want to have it all*, but also I want to nap. And watch The 100. And scroll through mindless hours of Tumblr. I've never been a math or science person, as much as my current Geology class has inspired interest in me, I'm not very skilled in either of those departments. But I read, and I can understand basic concepts, and that Newton character knew a thing or two. According to this handy-dandy teacher's site from the turn of this century, Newton's first law states: "An object at rest will remain at rest...An object in motion continues in motion." Which is what a little tiny voice whispers inside my mind when I fall face-down into bed at three in the afternoon and whine into my pillow until I force myself to get back up again. For most of last year, what got me to class in the morning was the promise of returning to bed in the afternoon but that's not even a passable lie anymore. I've been forced to get up in the morning like a normal human being and accept my (over)scheduled fate.

I'm pretty sure my best friend from high school once said, "It's not the size of the ship, but the motion in the ocean." Of course, we were giggling ninth graders and she was referencing something much different than I am, but whatever, same idea. I am a small human (or boat, for purposes of this metaphor) but it's what I do that makes a difference. Right? Sure, why not. Go with it. If Rachel Platten can write an entire song around a similar idea, I can post a blog about it.**

Also, it's The Great Gatsby's 90th birthday! Take my advice: if you've only ever read it for school, read it again. The popularity is not all hype; It is legitimately some kind of magical.

**The other day I actually met a guy in my English class who's favorite novel is Moby Dick. Ok. I wouldn't have believed him if his eyes didn't legitimately lit up when arguing that every single sea-related novel/movie/song basically owes it all to MD. Yay for sea-metaphors, I guess?

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